Faith & Life Weekend Seminars

Wandering Toward the Altar: A Forum on the Current State of Courtship & Dating

Presented by: Skip Burzumato

The confusion that marks courtship in our day is not only morally vague (and often personally frustrating), it is also socially destabilizing.  Many experts who study marriage and divorce believe there are ties between the fragile state of American marriage and the disorder of contemporary courtship.  That disorder is historically unprecedented.

(Ken Myers, from Mars Hill Audio Report, Wandering Toward the Altar: The Decline of American Courtship)

Description

Whenever young adults, as well as parents of young adults, are asked what issues in their lives are given the most thought, and cause them the most stress, dating and marriage always rank at the top of the list.  Ken Myers, producer and host of the Mars Hill Audio Journal says, [N]ot so long ago, Americans shared certain basic beliefs about the meaning and significance of marriage and about the proper way in which a young man and woman should work toward marriage through courtship.  This is not to say that all Americans acted similarly in courtship and marriage, or that conventions were never violated.  Nor is it to say that American conventions were always wise or desirable.  But there was a common script for courtship, a common set of manners, practices and understandings advocated by the culture, and this script was received by young people, not invented by them.  Even the men and women who flaunted courtship conventions acted with reference to them.

In 2000, Ken Myers and his staff produced a four-cassette audio report, Wandering Toward the Altar: The Decline of American Courtship.  These four tapes include interviews with experts, as well as commentary on the state of dating, courtship, and marriage today.  In the Spring of 2001, the undergraduate ministry staff at the Center for Christian Study in Charlottesville, Virginia, adapted the content of the Wandering Toward the Altar audio report for a large-group, moderated discussion with students at the University of Virginia.  One evening a week for eight weeks, students met together to listen to specially selected excerpts from the audio report and summarizing commentary by a moderator.  They were then asked a series of discussion questions.  This forum was such a success, that the Study Center is offering to bring it to churches and Christian institutions around the country.  It is our belief that this discussion needs to take place among our young people, parents, and ministry staff prior to the often confusing and chaotic college years.

Some of the issues discussed during are:

    · How dating, courtship, and marriage have changed over time

    · Whether the current absence of a “common script” for young people is a help or hindrance to them and society

    · How does a young adult today decides whether and when he or she will marry

    · What are the stress points in the relationship between career, marriage, and family in America today, especially among young women.

This discussion is from an orthodox Christian vantage point, with biblical principles weaved throughout.

Audience & Format

Wandering Toward the Altar: A Forum on the Current State of Courtship and Dating is geared toward young adults, parents of any aged children, extended family members, pastors, youth workers, teachers, or any combination of these groups.  

Six to eight hours of meeting time is recommended to cover the material thoroughly.  A Friday evening and Saturday morning format work well, as well as various retreat settings.  The presentation utilizes several audio clips from the Audio Report that have been extracted from the digital masters. With the use of audio clips, as well as continuous moderated discussion, “lecture fatigue” for the audience and speaker is kept to a minimum.

Moderator/Lecturer

The moderator/lecturer for the Wandering Toward the Altar Forum is the REV'D SKIP BURZUMATO, Executive Director at the Center for Christian Study.  Skip has over fifteen years of full-time student ministry experience, serving as a youth, college and assistant minister in various churches and ministries.  Before graduating from Reformed Theological Seminary in Jackson, Mississippi with a Master of Arts in Biblical Studies, he earned a Master of Arts degree in Sociology with an emphasis in religion and the family.  He has taught sociology of religion, sociology of the family, as well as theology and biblical studies on both the high school and college level.  He is an ordained priest in the Reformed Episcopal Church.  He lives with his wife, Stacey, of 19 years and their four children in Charlottesville, Virginia.

To contact Skip Burzumato you may either e-mail skip@studycenter.net or phone (434) 817-1050.

Downloadable Resources for Wandering Toward the Altar

        Wandering Toward the Altar Proposal (.pdf)

        Wandering Toward the Altar Bibliography (.pdf)

Supplemental essay on the Rise of the American Teenager (.pdf)

Interview with Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, author of

Why There are No Good Men Left (.pdf)

A History of the "Date"

A lecture delivered at Graduate Christian Fellowship October 2004

(.pdf)

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